From Sweet Dreams to Rocking Nights

Prior to becoming a parent, you are offered an overwhelming amount of advice covering every facet of parenthood.  In many cases, this advice is coming from a good and helpful place, and often considered in our household, BUT perhaps some of the best advice we received could be used in many parenting situations..."sometimes you just have to do what works for you."  So, in the winter of 2011-2012 as we battled one ear infection after another, usually beginning with a rough night, and little sleep, we started to do just that. 

Vinnie had always been the easy kid.  He slept through the night at 4 weeks.  He is a silent observer as we cruise down the aisles of the grocery store each week.  He is a perfect little angel in church (pun TOTALLY intended).  From the very beginning he had us questioning why everyone said transitioning to this parent role would be so hard.  Vinnie gave this mommy and daddy sweet dreams from very early on.  Now, I know that babies should be put to sleep awake, to help them learn to soothe themselves if/when they woke up in the middle of the night, but when you have a fussy, miserable, sick little baby, that you know a nap here and a good night sleep there would help, you do everything in your power to make that happen.  And so began our nights (and now this summer days) of rocking.  Each time Vinnie went to sleep...we would rock and rock until he was asleep.  We went from our happy sleeper, who slept through the night at only 4 weeks, to a not so happy sleeper, who took minimum 15 minutes to put down each night, after which I usually felt as though I had been drifting at sea from all the swaying and rocking AND woke up, crying out several times through the night. But worse than all of that was the thoughts tossing and turning in my head about the future battles that we were making for ourselves.  But...at the time it was necessary...and it worked.

Now, as we are quickly approaching Vinnie's 1st birthday, I have decided that things have got to change...for several reasons.  First and foremost, this kiddo is a wiggle worm, and it is becoming downright impossible to get him to sit still long enough to be rocked to sleep.  I also know that tackling this now will make for better nights sleep and perhaps even better naps and that is like gold as we begin to move toward August and the return of the early mornings of school responsibilities.

I started by tackling nap time, figuring if it didn't work...he just wouldn't nap for that morning or afternoon, but could make up for the lack of sleep in other parts of the day...  The first day it took 17 minutes to get him down.  Not one part of that time involved him crying and screaming.  He just bounced up and down in his crib and eventually wore himself out.  SUCCESS!  That night, bed time took a little longer, but again, no tears...we are on our way, I figured.

Then, last night, Jon and I were blessed with a little date night out, just the two of us.  Our baby sitter was one of Vinnie's teachers from the infant room at daycare...a sweet girl who fell in love with Vinnie from early on and was anxious to spend some extra time with him.  We warned her about our nightly battles...and trying to make an easier night for her, I told her, if it got really bad, she could just go ahead and rock him to sleep.  We returned home from our night out and were given the run down of the night...lots of play time, he just loves that green ball, took lots of pictures if you don't mind...and OH MY did he get upset at bedtime!  After spending a whole school year with Vinnie, she had never heard him cry like that.  AND...she just had to rock him to sleep.   Great.  I went to bed feeling horrible for breaking our routine, knowing that the next night (tonight) we would be starting from scratch.  And tonight we did just that...40 minutes of tears, screams, pulling himself up and falling down in his crib, rolling and flipping, he finally gave in and fell asleep.  All the while I was hiding in the basement, across the room from the monitor.

Despite the battles we have already had, and the ones that we know are waiting in our not so distant future, I don't regret the nights of rocking Vinnie to sleep.  It initially came from a place of necessity, and in those touch moments of parenthood you really have to do what works for you and keeps your little one happy, healthy, and safe!  I know we have had some pretty brutal nights recently, but I am confident with a little perseverance we will be back to those sweet dreams again!

Sweet dreams to all of you on this Sunday night!